


Make Me Feel

by runicmagitek



Series: Aerti Week 2020 [3]
Category: Final Fantasy VII Remake (Video Game 2020)
Genre: Alternate Scene, Alternate Timelines, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon-Typical Violence, Defying Destiny Yet Always Choosing Each Other, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Final Fantasy VII Remake Spoilers, First Kiss, Mid-Canon, Mutual Pining, Sharing Other Lives Together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-23
Updated: 2020-09-23
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:29:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,507
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26606773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/runicmagitek/pseuds/runicmagitek
Summary: What if things go wrong? What if we’re separated? What if we don’t make it out alive?But if Aerith stood tall and unwavering before the portal and their so-called destiny, then Tifa was sure to follow. Yet she hesitated, the words dying on her tongue. Even her eyes fell from the lovely green ones she didn’t realize she was fond of until they were gone.What if I never get a chance to tell you how I really feel?While confronting the Whispers, Tifa catches glimpses of not only their preordained future, but also of the lives she could have lived. All of which include Aerith.
Relationships: Aerith Gainsborough/Tifa Lockhart
Series: Aerti Week 2020 [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1932154
Comments: 10
Kudos: 103





	Make Me Feel

**Author's Note:**

> Day 3 - cool tones | red string of fate | _appetence:_ an eager desire, an instinctive inclination; an attraction or natural bond

She hadn’t thought much of them. The smoky shadows proved to be an occasional distraction, forgotten as soon as the fight ended. Far more tangible threats demanded her attention: Don Corneo, the destruction of the Sector 7 pillar, Shinra, and Sephiroth himself. Even when Aerith named them—the Whispers—Tifa was more concerned with escaping Shinra headquarters than contemplating fate.

The portal at the end of the highway glowed and pulsed. The ethereal motions were almost seductive, enticing her and the others to enter. Tifa swallowed hard. Did she _really_ wish to confront that which controlled destiny? Maybe it was best to stay ignorant. So long as everyone was safe, she cared little of where her path took her.

She scanned her allies, hoping to find strength in their decisions. As she settled on Aerith, she hitched her breath. Since they met, Aerith was a brilliant light in their journey. Always sharing her optimism and never faltering. But now, her face hardened and tight fists trembled at her sides and piercing eyes stared through the portal.

Tifa approached her, then froze. What was she to say to soothe her nerves? Maybe words weren’t needed. Sometimes a hug sufficed, at least for Tifa. Reaching for Aerith, she stopped and thought better of the decision.

Before Tifa dropped her hand, Aerith turned to her. The sharp gaze softened, if only for Tifa. “You ready?” she asked.

The usual bubbly tone didn’t greet Tifa. Her words bore a weight she didn’t recognize. Not with Aerith. It was as if wisdom flooded past her lips, concealed until now. Tifa blinked, unsure how to reply, save for tugging Aerith into a tight embrace.

_What if things go wrong? What if we_ _’re separated? What if we don’t make it out alive?_

But if Aerith stood tall and unwavering before the portal and their so-called destiny, then Tifa was sure to follow. Yet she hesitated, the words dying on her tongue. Even her eyes fell from the lovely green ones she didn’t realize she was fond of until they were gone.

_What if I never get a chance to tell you how I really feel?_

Gentle hands enveloped her own. Tifa flicked her eyes back up. Aerith clung Tifa’s gloved hand to her chest. The hint of a smile tugged at her lips.

“We’ll be alright,” Aerith said with a nod.

 _How do you know?_ Tifa wanted to ask. Instead, she curled her fingers into Aerith and released a trembling breath. “I hope so. Won’t go down without a fight, at least.”

Her smile brightened—both on her lips and in her eyes. “That’s the spirit.”

She didn’t want Aerith to let go, nor did she wish to follow her through the portal. But she did, because what other choice did they have? Well, they didn’t. Not when the Whispers existed.

Maybe when it was all over, Tifa could forge her own destiny, something that included Aerith. Maybe she’d find the words to say, by then.

The group approached the portal. They entered, despite their fears.

Tifa held her breath and closed her eyes. The light overwhelmed the night. A perpetual, cool breeze enveloped her. When she forced her eyes open, she stood not on the highway, but on an endless sea. Blue light glowed all around. Not a ripple marred the mirror-like surface beneath her. Tifa shivered. Her fingers twitched. The sooner she found something to punch, the better.

The Whispers didn’t reveal themselves to her or the others. Not at first. Not how they _had_.

One step and the surreal surroundings morphed. Blue haze clouded her vision. Tifa whirled around and found nothing. Her heart raced in her ears. She flailed, fingers sifting through the cool mist. No warmth brushed her fingertips.

“Aerith!” she cried out.

Silence loomed around Tifa, thick enough to suffocate. Her knees buckled and she dropped. After a breath, Tifa slammed a fist into the ground and forced herself to stand.

“No,” she hissed. “I’m not giving up on you.”

Distant words teased her ears. Tifa pivoted, spun around, and nailed her foot into whatever tormented her. The Whispers shifted, almost wailed. Tifa ignored the cries as she dropped into an offensive stance.

She couldn’t, however, ignore the images that flooded her being.

* * *

Flames engulfed the reactor. The bridge groaned and broke from its supports. Tifa slipped with a shriek, grasping a broken, metal ledge. Cloud cried for her, as did Barret. Both extended a hand, yet neither reached her. Tifa glanced up, bursts of fire blinding her as the reactor crumbled. Her muscles screamed and quaked; no number of pull-ups prepared her for this.

“ _Go!_ ” she screamed. “ _Get out of here!_ ”

She hoped they heard her over the explosions. Tifa yearned to say more, but her grip weakened and the bridge trembled and nothing short of a miracle could save her from the disaster that unraveled.

And somehow she opened her eyes after plummeting for an eternity. The fresh scent of lilies—like the one she kept alive in a mason jar behind the bar—filled her lungs. Light swept over her face, but it was the kind voice that nudged her awake.

“ _Oh! You moved! Hello? You alright?_ ”

Tifa forced her eyes open. The world blurred. Pushing herself to seated, she groaned and rubbed her head. Bruises swelled all over her body, but nothing was broken.

She almost missed the pretty, smiling face dipping into view.

“ _Hey, do I know you?_ ”

Tifa rubbed her neck and blinked. Brown curls framed the face parallel to hers. Sunlight caught in the strands and set it aflame—like a halo. But it was the eyes that entranced Tifa, a hue as vibrant as her prized materia.

The same eyes that caught her attention outside of the Sector 1 mako reactor. The ones that convinced her to buy a single flower for a gil. The lovely gaze she thought of every time she glanced at the lily on display at Seventh Heaven. A bit of light in the slums, something to make her smile.

She thought of the girl who bestowed her with such a kind gift more often than she wanted to admit.

“ _It_ _’s…_ you,” Tifa said. “ _The flower girl._ ”

An open hand extended to Tifa. She reciprocated, ghosted fingertips across soft skin.

More images bombarded her. The surroundings melted and yielded to new scenery. She recognized the Sector 5 orphanage—Biggs loved gushing about it. Children laughed and ran around her. Innocent giggles caught Tifa’s attention, all belonging to _her_.

Together, they brought flowers to decorate the exterior. They played with the children. They greeted the locals in passing, who in turn asked about the young lady accompanying their favorite flower girl.

“ _She_ —” Green eyes winked at Tifa. “— _is my bodyguard_.”

She insisted on that title as they held hands and meandered Sector 5, the lush garden by her house, and even inside as they retired for the night.

“ _You know,_ ” she drew out while Tifa sat on the guest bed, “ _you don_ _’t have to leave, if you don’t want to._ ”

Before she finished her sentence, Tifa vaulted off the mattress, marched to her, cupped her face, leaned in, and—

* * *

Tifa stumbled. The Whispers circled her. Regaining her composure, she raised her fists and fashioned a deadly stare at the abominations.

Silhouettes flitted through the haze. Familiar faces emerged. The sight of her allies restored hope in her racing heart.

But no Aerith. Not yet.

 _It_ _’ll be alright,_ she reminded herself. Because Aerith said so.

Because they had no other choice.

Tifa charged a looming figure and pummeled it with punch after punch. Blips of a predestined future blinded her, but Tifa clenched her jaw and pushed on. Through the relentless agony and confusion, she remained standing. Fists struck her target. With a sharp cry, Tifa sank her heel into its core.

The world blurred, then brightened.

* * *

Cold, metal walls surrounded Tifa. Two men donning white coats flanked and towered over her. They walked the corridor and spoke of a life that was hers, but wasn’t.

“ _She fell by the Nibelheim reactor._ ”

“ _It_ _’s a wonder she survived._ ”

“ _Send the samples to the lab to test further. She might have been exposed to—_ ”

Her gaze fell as the voices grew distant and fuzzy. She smoothed tiny hands over a dress she hadn’t worn since she was a child. Tears welled in her eyes as she recalled the exact day she last wore it. She cried, then, too.

They introduced Tifa to a room—her own. No warmth resonated in the cramped space. Everything—the walls, the bed, the single dresser, the floors—was a different shade of blue. She almost tasted the metal in the air as she shuffled inside. More tears fell. She wanted to be in _her_ room with the piano and stuffed animals and thick blankets and fresh flowers and a window. Wherever she was now, it was far from home.

A tiny knock sounded from her door. Tifa lifted her tear-stained face. How long had she been alone? She sank deeper into the corner and hugged her knees to her chest. Perhaps the men who took her blood work were back for more. But the door never opened and the knock returned.

Drying her eyes with a loose fist, Tifa approached the door and cracked it open.

A girl her age and height face her. She smiled and bounced in place. “ _Oh hello! You must be new!_ ”

Was she? Tifa grasped for the truth and found nothing.

The girl leaned in and tilted her head. “ _I_ _’m Aerith! Pleased to meet you._ ” When Tifa succumbed to silence, she continued, “ _I hope we can be friends. I always wanted one. There_ _’s never any other kids around here._ ”

A million thoughts screamed in Tifa’s head. She drew in a jagged breath and nodded. “ _I_ _’d like that._ ” Remembering her manners, she offered her hand. “ _I_ _’m Tifa._ ”

Aerith gasped. “ _Tifa! That_ _’s so pretty!_ ”

Their hands met. The cold room disappeared. Bright chalk adorned a wall, depicting the fantastical creatures that only existed in fairy tales. Aerith laughed, colorful smears covering her hands. Tifa stood next to her with a blue chalk wedge in her grasp. They smiled and told each other stories of the creatures swirling to life on the wall. Once the chalk wore down to nubs, they collapsed on the metal frame of Aerith’s bed and wiped their hands off on their clothing without a care.

“ _One day,_ ” Aerith said, regarding the mural with a sense of yearning, “ _I_ _’d like to leave this place and see all those cool creatures._ ”

Tifa snorted. “ _They don_ _’t exist, silly._ ”

“ _You don_ _’t know that! But… maybe there are other cool things. Stuff no one’s found yet._ ” She gasped and clutched Tifa’s hand. “ _We could be explorers!_ ”

“ _We?_ ”

“ _Yeah! Wouldn_ _’t that be fun? Just traveling across the world and finding all kinds of neat things_.”

Aerith rattled off details of their imaginary journey. As for Tifa, she admired the way her cheeks dimpled ever-so-slightly while she laughed. And how her eyes glimmered in the sparse light. And how she bounced in place whenever she was excited. And how her hair was long enough to frame her face.

A stray strand fell from behind Aerith’s ear. She continued to talk while Tifa reached out, caught the lock of hair in her fingers, and tucked it back behind her ear. Aerith paused and blinked.

Tifa chewed her lip as she retracted her hand. “ _I_ _… I really like your hair. It’s pretty._ ”

Aerith’s lips widened into a grin. “ _I like yours, too._ ”

Tifa sat up taller. “ _Really?_ ”

“ _Really really! There_ _’s so much of it! I… I’d love to braid it for you one day._ ”

“ _Why not now?_ ”

“ _What?! You mean it?!_ ”

Tifa giggled as Aerith squealed and flailed in delight. They scooted until Aerith sat behind her. Once Aerith’s giddy clapping died down, she sifted fingers through Tifa’s long, dark hair.

She closed her eyes and leaned into Aerith. Gentle motions manipulated her hair. Tifa smiled, imagining a life outside of the lab. Aerith hummed and Tifa memorized the sounds, just like everything else.

It faded from view when she opened her eyes.

Tifa gulped down shallow breaths. The walls zoomed by her. Blackness hung above, but she couldn’t discern if it was more metal or the night sky. It had been so long… she didn’t know the difference anymore. All she knew was every inch of her burned and ached from running.

The tight hand in hers, however, urged her to keep going.

“ _Come on!_ ” Aerith said between gasps. “ _We can lose them this way—_ ”

They rounded the corner and skidded. Tifa crashed into Aerith as they stumbled to a standstill. Spotlights struck them. Tifa held up an arm to block the harsh lights, her other wrapped around Aerith, who clung to her.

“ _There you are._ ” A suited man stepped into the light to offer honeyed words. “ _We_ _’ve been looking all over for you two since you escaped._ ” He knelt and held out his hand. “ _Come along, now. Let_ _’s go back._ ”

Tifa looked back and forth between the gloved hand and his smirking face. “ _We_ _’re not going back._ ”

“ _Tifa,_ ” Aerith whispered into her neck, “ _we can_ _’t fight them._ ”

The man scoffed and gestured for other suited figures to join him.

“ _I_ _’m tired,_ ” Aerith continued, burying her face into Tifa’s shoulder. “ _My legs hurt. We_ _… we can just go back. It was a dumb idea._ ”

Tifa turned into Aerith, nuzzling her face into hers. They shared tears for a life they would never have.

“ _It_ _’s okay,_ ” Tifa said, settling Aerith to the ground. “ _You don_ _’t have to fight._ ”

Aerith refused to release Tifa’s hand as she stood, looking up with wide eyes. “ _W-what?_ ”

Tifa gazed into those lovely eyes. Maybe when everything was over, they could have another sleepover and they could gaze at each other until they fell asleep.

Tugging her hands free, Tifa spun to meet the men and lifted her fists. “ _We_ _’re not going back!_ ”

Several laughed. The one in the middle cocked his head. “ _You think you can take us?_ ”

Before he finished that train of thought, Tifa bolted at them, screaming until her voice cracked. Her fist flew forward. She thought she heard Aerith call her—

* * *

The ground rose to meet Tifa. She yelped and winced. Not her most graceful fall, but bruises healed. Returning to her feet, albeit with a wobble, Tifa scanned the area and found not the topside streets of Midgar or the Shinra labs, but a surreal, deteriorating landscape ruled by the Whispers.

“What the hell is going on?” Tifa muttered to herself.

Her name echoed on the wind. She spun around to meet the origin, yet found nothing but wild, smoky currents blurring the area.

“Aerith?” she called out.

No one answered and her heart dropped.

“Aerith!” she shrieked.

She tried again and again, until the words crackled and sputtered on her lips. Tears flooded her vision. Goosebumps prickled her skin until she dropped to her knees. The Whispers circled her. She swore they laughed at her pitiful attempts.

“We’ll be alright,” Tifa murmured for no one to hear. “You said we would. We _have_ to be. You—”

Tifa gasped and jerked her head up. Wide eyes flitted about. Nothing appeared, yet she swore she heard it—a hint of an echo.

The shadows and haze shifted. A familiar form appeared first as a shadow, then in the flesh. Aerith stepped out of the mist, frantically searched the area, then settled her sights on Tifa.

And she smiled.

“Tifa!” She ran and dropped to her knees to meet her. “Oh, I’ve been looking all over for you.”

“Is it you?” Tifa asked. “Is it _really_ you?”

Aerith clasped her hand and nodded. “Yup! The one and only.”

Tifa coughed up laughter. She longed to yank her into a hard hug, just to be sure. The howl looming overheard said otherwise.

“Looks like we’ve got company,” Aerith grumbled. “Let’s show these things who’s boss. Maybe we’ll find the others along the way.” As Aerith stood, she helped Tifa to her feet. “You going to be okay?”

“I will, now that you’re here,” Tifa said.

She tried to remember Aerith’s smile and the way her hand lingered on the small of her back before they let go. She thought of all the moments they shared—in their current life and others—and hoped it was enough to anchor her, to grant her victory.

Aerith brandished her staff and Tifa lifted her fists. They met the Whispers halfway when reality slipped away.

* * *

A cold numbness washed over Tifa. She blinked her eyes open, yet nothing sharpened and focused. Crystalline structures encased the vast space. She inhaled salty air and exhaled a bloody cough. Tears splashed her cheeks. Slowly, she turned her head.

Aerith knelt over her, sobbing uncontrollably.

“ _Tifa, it_ _’ll be alright,_ ” she repeated like a hysterical mantra. “ _I-I can_ _’t heal it with materia, but… Cloud is getting more potions and I’m going to keep pressure here until—_ ”

Her hand moved on its own, a dead weight attached to her. She crashed into Aerith’s hands pressed firmly against her abdomen. Tifa rested over her trembling hands. Briefly, Aerith retracted one to sweep hair out of her eyes and slicked the locks with blood.

“ _Aerith,_ ” she tried to say, but every tiny motion proved to be an arduous task.

“ _No,_ ” Aerith squeaked out and cupped Tifa’s face. “ _No no no, don_ _’t speak. Save your strength._ ” Their foreheads met. “ _Please, keep your eyes open. Look at me. Tifa,_ please. _No. No no, don_ _’t do this. I—_ ” She hiccupped and failed to blink away the tears. “— _I don_ _’t want to lose you. Not like that. Not ever. It… it was supposed to be_ me _, silly. Why did you save me?_ ”

“ _Because,_ ” Tifa began to say, only to forget the rest of it.

The warmth radiating from Aerith grew further away, even though she clung to Tifa. Her eyes fell shut and a pained scream begged her not to.

Then they snapped open and the world returned to focus. Except Tifa stood at the bottom of the crystal alter and Aerith prayed there and she only looked up when Tifa cried her name and—

* * *

Fire blazed to life. The Whispers screamed and withered and perished. Even then, Tifa pelted the ground with deadly punches.

“Tifa?”

Sensation returned to her hands, her face, her stomach. She wanted to scream until the hollow rot in her core ceased to exist.

“Tifa!”

Metal clattered on the ground, no doubt Aerith’s staff. Just like the hand latching onto her shoulder was Aerith’s. As was the face gazing at her teary eyes.

“It’s alright,” she told Tifa, smoothing hair out of her face. “We made it. We—”

Tifa grabbed the lapels of her jacket, jerked her forward, and crushed her lips against her own. A light gasp vibrated upon her lips. Then the hands on her shoulders melted away and snaked around Tifa’s neck while Aerith sank into her. Something fierce, yet tender, just like the woman who came to save her.

“Tifa,” she murmured between kisses, almost cooing her name.

Begrudgingly breaking free for air, Tifa rested her forehead against Aerith’s. They locked stares and sat there as the world around them dared to pry them apart.

“Did you see it?” Tifa asked. “Those… visions?”

Aerith fell silent. “I saw _a lot_ of things.”

“Aerith, I—”

“Hey, it’s alright.” She held Tifa’s hands for emphasis. “Whatever happens, so long as I’ve got you around, I’m happy. You know why?”

Tifa didn’t respond. Aerith eased in to boop her nose with her own.

“I’ll find you,” she continued. “In this life or the next or the one after it. We might be tearing down fate, but I’ll always be tied to you. And you to me.”

“How do you know?” Tifa asked.

“Because I _want_ to always choose you.”

Tears dared to blind Tifa, but nothing could restrain the grin she bore for Aerith. They laughed and hugged and ignored the perils whirling around them. They helped each other stand, never straying more than an inch from each other.

“When this is all over,” Tifa said, “you still owe me a date.”

Aerith jerked her head back and cackled. “Don’t you think we’re _way_ past that?”

Tifa smirked and recalled the lives they might’ve lived, could’ve lived, almost lived. “Maybe, but let’s make it ours. In _this_ lifetime. Nothing destiny can stop us from doing.”

Gathering her staff, Aerith pondered on the offer, then nodded. “Deal.”

They shook on it, but never released each other’s hands.

“Come on,” Tifa said, “let’s go save the boys from whatever mess they got themselves into.”

“Lead the way!”

Side-by-side, they approached the shadowy currents, stepped into through the haze, and never let go.


End file.
